Faith Healers

This is just a general opinion, I'm not targeting any specific faith healer.  On Paganspace.com there is a post about a young woman hurt by her mother when the mother asked her daughter not to pray to her fake gods for her health.  The topic leads to faith healing when more information reveals how the mother's minister tells her she will be healed by faith, not medication.


I'm no fan of over prescribing antibiotics, but when you have a chronic condition or a deadly one I don't think doctors are trying to kill you any faster.  There is nothing wrong with looking to faith to help heal you, but reputable herbalists and Riki workers will tell their patients to seek modern medical help along with their alternative testaments.


The statement may be just a legal nicety, but I believe using both alternative and Western medicine can aid in healing the body and soul.  Western doctors tend to treat the symptoms and find the cause later, perhaps a little spiritual guidance is what the mind needs when prospecting suffering and pain?  If yoga, riki, herbal remedies, meditation make you feel better why not try them?  

by Mysid

There is no harm in trying alternative techniques, however, if anyone tells you to ignore medical advice and says only they can heal you, roll your eyes and walk away.  Faith is one idea, but absolute trust in an individual who goes beyond simple assistance and into I'm the one territory is dangerous.  There are many people who just want to be healed and have their pain go away, but this want doesn't mean throwing caution to the wind.


Do not let people take advantage of your hope, it's yours, trust a few people with it alone because if it sounds unbelievable, it probably is.


Have you ever been scammed by a spiritual practitioner?

Finding Nature in Urban Living

My little herb garden

I live in downtown in a large city surrounded by other cities.  There are nice parks around my home, but I wouldn't call them "natural" because they are constructed greenery for the eye.

I'm lucky that I have a decent size backyard where I can cultivate, but also let nature grow.  I have a garden and a few planters, but otherwise I just sow the seeds and let them sprout on their own.  Not everyone has this luxury and I recomend heading out to a local bike path, it may be the closest picture to a nature scene from a National Park.

If you want to create a little space for nature in your apartment, it can be a little more difficult.  Some buildings do not even allow plants or there isn't any space for them.  If possible you could always speak to your landlord and ask if he would allow a small garden for everyone to enjoy, unlikely, but there is no harm in it.

If your landlord says no, you can always plant a small herb garden in your kitchen window, just don't forget to water.  I have one outside my front door, it's close enough for cooking, but if I could fit the herbs in my kitchen I would have.

Also, there are local community gardens you could sign up for or just walk by and enjoy.  This will not only help the community, but add some vegstables and geen visuals into your life.  I've seen these pop up around schools and if people don't parpisipate they will just dissapear.

buckets of plants

I think having acess to nature is not only important for Pagans, but as a community as a whole.  I'm not talking lawns with immigrant workers mowing the lawn, but places where nature is allowed to be or even just a garden in the front yard.

I have asked my friends to plant with me in my large back yard to offer them a place to relax and some fresh vegstables.  Gardens and nature promote community and make the block look presentable for people just walking by.

What do you do to connect with nature?

American Colleges Murder Artists

Sweeney Hall SJSU Outside

I went through some depression while I was at SJSU and ranked up $20,000 in student loans.  Sadly this was not only a waste of time because I decided to peruse a Child Development degree at De Anza College, rather than my Creative Writing degree, but I couldn't complete hardly any of my classes because of how depressed I was.


The only problem I to have are getting the federal government to find my taxes for 2011.  I cannot simply print out my tax forms from Turbotax, no, they want documents from the government.   I've tried all my addresses, talked to a representative who said all the tax forms are not in yet, so there is a chance I will not be going to school in the fall.

Sweeney Hall Inside
What am I paying for?

If the school wants to encourage students it should be relatively simple for students who apply, especially when you have to have official documents from the federal government.  The government is slow and still cannot find my information.  I'm just so frustrated.


I believe De Anza is making their students do some of the legwork because of the lack of staff and horrible education cuts.  I just wish they chose another way to reduce their costs, because I cannot see how this is making a student's life any easier.


To go even further when a student works part-time it leaves less time for studying.  But he needs to work to pay off his bills, unless he lives at home or has financial support from his parents.  If he does need to work, he still doesn't earn enough to pay the bills and has to have a loan.  This makes the student acquire debt.

Coffee Backpack
by Rocketpacks1

Yes, education is an investment, but at what cost?  Lack of health care for the student, sleep deprivation, emotional stress, poor diet, long work hours, financial debt all promote health issues spanning well beyond college years.  


After a student acquires all of this stress and debt there is no other option but to "opt to major in fields that will give them more marketable skills in the current job market: Think computer science, information technology, and engineering" (From the interview with Andrew Delbanco on NPR).  The artists are dead because society has murdered them financially, so will only rich children shape the art in America?


I think all of this helps promote the stress and unhealthy fervor for money.  I plan not to pay back my student loans for as long as possible, because I do not think my higher education helped me peruse the goals I wanted.  I felt they threw a bunch of English classes together and some writing classes, only 15/48 units were writing classes; not even half the classes you are required to take focus on your personal writing ability.

by Axstrat

Perhaps this is just the major I chose, and changed after I was so unhappy, but if colleges cannot make an effort to help liberal arts students making a living in a field they love, what is the point of earning a degree?

My Grandma's Wisdom

by George Nikoladze

Happy Fourth of July to all you Americans out there and on this Fourth I would like to remember my grandmother.

She was actually one of the first female managers at Lockheed and worked on projects she can still not talk about because of top secret status.  Yes my grandmother is a true American, but now I'm worried about losing her.

I was lucky enough to know my great grandmother on my mother's side and lost her around the age of fifteen.  Now I'm facing both of my grandmother's health issues, but mainly from my father's side.

My grandmother used to live about a quarter of a mile away from my childhood home, but now she rents an apartment about an hour and a half away from her closest family.  I keep telling her she can't take care of her aging friends when she has no one close to care for her.

She lived a hard life in Colorado, where her mother died around the age of 50 and my grandmother was left to care for her own small children and some of her siblings.  The older siblings were left to the state and suffered from horrible abuses and never truly forgave my grandmother for it.

Source: U.S. National Archives and
 Records Administration

Many stories lie beneath her wrinkles and she is a devoted Christian whose love and kindness is not tainted by extreme opinion.  There is still time to sit down with her and record her stories and even though she will never know I'm a witch I want to remember her as a person.

Elders die and we move on, but their knowledge can be lost forever and this is why I'm going to make an effort and try to record my grandmother's stories.  This would honor her and keep her alive in a way before she passes on to where she believes she will end up.

How do you honor your ancestors?  I know it's more of a Samhain question, but sometimes there is only so much time before they go.

Dream: Surrogate Mother

Robertsan1 painter Schrotzberg died in 1926

I don't often have dreams, but when I do I try to write them down.  The phase of the moon was waxing gibbous, June 30, 2012.

This wasn't one of my strangest dreams, but it was strange for me to be expecting a baby.  I like nannying for children, but as for having one, I like to sleep in on weekends.

My boyfriend Mike and I were using a surrogate to have a child,  I saw the image of the child to be in my dream while Mike and I were at some sort of healthclub.  Apparently it was with the surrogates egg and his sperm she was pregnant, probably because my genetics were horrible.

I have diabetes, epilepcy, heart disease, cancer, altimerz all on my side of the family.  Mike's is realtivly healthy, so I imagine we decided to use the surrogates egg.

Tripton's Hand by
Portraitlady4306

I remember asking why Mike suddenly wanted a baby after we discussed not having children.  That's about the time I woke up.

I like to use dream moods for interpreting my dreams and went there and searched: surrogate, health club, baby, swiming pool and sperm.  he dream could be a literal interpretation, however I do not think so.  Considering my rededication to Wicca, I think it symbolizes more of a new beginning for me.  Even the health club has meaning, it could mean to apply what I have already learnd.  Even the surrogate was a symbol showing how I was missing my path in my life.

I rearely remember my dreams and think everyone I do remember as important.  Of course my boyfriend thinks a dream is just a dream.

Any strange dreams you would like to share?

Bad Kids, No Sugar For You

One of the families I nanny for live about 1/2 an hour away from any city.  They have a compost pile, septic tank, generator, solar panels, an organic filled fridge and no sugar added.


I firmly believe feeding children sugary drinks and snacks all day is detrimental to their health, however I do not think completely depriving a child is any better for their relationship with sugar.


Sugar is apart of our everyday lives and it is healthier to teach children to make smart choices rather than completely ignoring the question.  This not only applies to food but sex, alcohol, relationships, every social interaction depends on choices and avoiding the tough questions makes them harder to answer later.


I can just see the obsession in her eyes when Maple asks her mom if she can have sugary cakes, drinks, cookies, ice cream, processed foods on her birthday; the one day in the year where she is allowed added sugar.  Maple is only three, but I can already see the emotional desperation forming under her voice.


Every time where I find an obsession focused on food I reveal an emotionally disturbed person who does not know how to make wise decisions about food.  I was personally sugar pushed by my mother and used food to relieve my depression.  Maple does live in an emotionally adjusted family, however, their ideas about sugar need to take a turn or risk a severe obsession within Maple.

Carrots Caused This

The question is how does a parent manage sugar and let their child enjoy it?  A simple answer is not to make a big deal out of sugar, just treat it like any other food and limit it like any other food.  Carrots may be healthy, but eating too many will turn a person orange and make constipation an issue.  In short, moderation in all things.


I really do not think parents need to worry too much about their children eating added sugar if they feed them a healthy diet and let them have some sugary treat once in a while.  It's likely the sugar will be overwhelming to their taste buds and they will only want an occasional taste in the long run.  Obsession begins with denial, so don't deny children candy just don't make such a big deal about it and the children will follow suit.

Mundane Work and Healthcare

I decided to play with my Ouija board again and my boyfriend is joining me tonight.  II'm kind of excited and hope it will work out.

Sometimes I find the Ouija board will not work very well for me, but as long as it's fun I don't really care if it works very well.  Of course I'm setting up a protection circle, spraying some sage and using protection oils just in case.  I haven't cleansed the house, except for a vacuum, since we moved in here in February.

I don't feel any negativity from this house, in fact I think some fairies are hanging out in my garden, I'll have to take some pictures when the flowers start to bloom.

I did pick up some supplies today, with my friend John, at the witchy store by the sea, because sometimes I just want to visit the ocean and chill.  Not chilling today though because I had videos to make and I'm still a little tired from yesterday.

I purchased some sage spray and protection oil and we stayed at the beach for a moment to make a quick video.

I'm really trying to just get my magickal groove back and focus on my art I've started but haven't finished because I was working six days a week for about a month.

I really can't imagine working two jobs, it kills me because you never have a break, especially from the mundane things like cooking dinner, cleaning, washing clothes, shopping, ect.  Celebrities have people to do those mundane activities for them, pointed out by Craked.com for why talking advice from rich people would be a dumb idea; celebrities do not live in a poor person's reality.

It's weird how you decide not to allow time for yourself because of all the mundane going on all around you.  You forget about magick and focus all your energy to just moving your car, your work, your schedule  and your emotions around to just to zombie your way through life.

It reminds me of the book The Working Poor where people just work until the drop because the government failed them.  

I'm pissed off with not being able to afford health insurance.  The minimum is about $100, but I have diabetes, so who knows how high it can go up.  

Everyone knows when people aren't covered, everyone suffers from high cost patients with no way to pay.  I honestly believe a healthy people is a happy people and why government is so against letting voters be happy.

People say it costs too much, but when someone goes bankrupt because of medical bills, I think that price is too high to pay.  America is the only first world country without a government run medical system, obviously it works if the rest of the world is using it.

Sometimes having one part of your life in chaos impedes the development or structure of others, my health may or may not be in order, although I do try to avoid carbs and sugar.  Seeking spiritual calm will only help, so why not keep up the dedication to my path.

Becoming balanced in one way will help steamroll the others into like I think, so I'm just going to live and meditate on life for the time being.

 

Monster of a Mother

Has it truly been almost three months since my last post? I severely apologize for the hiatus, but it was necessary for me to actually deal with some mundane issues. The most prominent one is my hoarding mother's health.

Currently she is at home, but she is going to dialysis, finally, to help with the collection of poison collecting in her body. She did not go until she fasted and took her insulin one night, bringing her sugars down to 20. However, when at home she still believes she is in control of her body and can order everyone around like her little drones.

There is no appreciation from her. It's strange to be a daughter and seeing the monster of a mother before you, slowly shrink into this little creature screaming for attention. I have the power now, we as a family have the strength to finally say no and it ticks her off.

Otherwise, I've been trying to keep busy making videos, writing and dating some guys, but it annoys me having to answer the same questions over and over again. I guess that's the price I pay when looking for somebody new.

As for my magickal life, nothing much happening at the moment. I am planning a Summer Solstice ritual for this week (yes I know it's late, but I'm still celebrating), but really I've been over worked and stressed and I haven't been focusing so much on my spirituality.

I feel horrible, but I truly need to make an effort, I need a break, I need energy and I need guidance, but I have to work for it.

Well, night and merry part.

Life Sucks, Then You Recover Over TIme

My mother is dying of kidney failure caused by her lack of control of her diabetes. I myself am a diabetic and it has been absolutely devastating having to suffer through her karma.

I say karma because she tried to control everything and everybody around her through abuse and aggression. Now she has absolutely no control over her health and life.

I really do not know what to do, I'm still angry at her and I feel it's very dangerous to do any magick when in this depressing state.

Currently I'm reading a self-help book, called Toxic Parents and it's been very painful to relapse through horrible memories from my lack of childhood.

This is why I haven't posted, I'm very stressed out and haven't had time to write anything profound or magickal.

Thanks for reading,
Blessed Be.